I've been giving "Mom" a lot of thought lately. I'm one of those "young mamas." You know, the ones that all the older, intellectual, "do it smart" mothers think are ridiculous. Okay, not all of them (I have some very cool older-than-me friends who treat me quite nicely). But, well, you get lots of looks. I tend to look younger than I actually am, so I get even more.
I had my daughter when I was just barely 19. Looking back, it seems like a crazy thing to do, now realizing how young I actually was. But it felt like the right choice, and I was very happy with it. At times, as I get older and I find more opportunities that I could have participated in childless, I feel twinges of wishing I had postponed motherhood until later. But honestly, when all is said and done, motherhood has been the best choice of my life. No, it's not an easy choice. There are brief moments where I wonder what I was thinking - I mean really. Me? a mom? But what they have given me is so great and such an amazing gift, that I wouldn't change it for the whole world.
There are moments where I just hold my babies, knowing that there is not a thing in the world more important than our relationship. Knowing that I am the most important person in the world to them, and they to me. I made a solemn promise to myself that I would try to be the best mother I could possibly be, and even go beyond my best. A challenge, yes, but really I feel like it is my duty and passion to give them the most loving childhood one could possibly have. I fail miserably all too often. But I have learned to release guilt, accept that I am a mere mortal, and trust that my desire to be better is great, and my love is even greater. As the father from The Daily Groove (my daily salvation) says: It really is okay.
Though I fight against being seen as "only" a mother (a person's a person, no matter how much of their life is devoted to a small child), really, motherhood is my greatest life's work. My kiddos keep me centered, focused on what really matters, and truly, in love with life.
So, cheers to being a momma, no matter where you're coming from, where you're going, or how you're getting there. Really, being a mother rocks!
